So it?s Big Brother Season again, time for another bunch of over-confident nit-wits to enter the house so the British public can dissect their every move, action and nuance.

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This year we have the biggest bunch of weird, self obsessed and egotistical ever so here is our guide to the biggest television car crash in history.

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The contestants

?ALEXANDRA DE-GALEAge: 23From: CroydonOccupation: Accounts ExecutiveAlexandra is a single mother, who had her daughter when she was 16 years old. She describes herself as quirky, outgoing and a go-getter, and hates to be bored. Appearance-wise, she gives herself 10/10 for looks, and says “love me or hate me ? you?ll be obsessed!”?DENNIS McHUGHAge: 23From: EdinburghOccupation: Dance student and teacher

Dennis describes himself as egotistical, flamboyant, and competitive - and he lives for getting attention. He thinks he?ll be an “agony aunt” for other housemates and thinks that people will remember him simply as “wow”.

?JENNIFER CLARK
Age: 22
From: Durham
Occupation: Part-time model, full-time mum

Jennifer describes herself as ambitious, ruthless and opinionated - and says she wouldn?t enter Big Brother if she didn?t think she could win. Jennifer says her motivation for doing Big Brother is to make her daughter and loved ones proud.

?DALE HOWARD
Age: 21
From: Liverpool
Occupation: PE Teaching student/part-time studentA part-time DJ, Dale is desperate to be rich and famous and have girls screaming his name. He rates himself 10/10 for looks and believes his peers are often jealous of him. Dale loves “fit” girls and has a thing about women with funny noses! His dream celebrity dates would be Mischa Barton and Abbie Clancey.?KATHREYA KASISOPA
Age: 30
From: Kent, originally from Thailand
Occupation: Thai massage therapist

Kathreya is Big Brother?s first Thai housemate. She came to the UK from Thailand seven years ago to study. She?s scared of the dark, heights and has a hatred of feet. She also doesn?t take drugs or drink alcohol, and says that she doesn?t really understand British humour.

?DARNELL SWALLOW
Age: 26
From: London
Occupation: Songwriter

Darnell is a 26 year-old housemate who was born in Ipswich, raised in St Louis (USA) and now lives in London. He gives himself three out of ten in physical attractiveness and says he is “way too skinny with a massive head”.

?LISA APPLETON
Age: 40
From: Warrington
Occupation: Sales rep for a beauty and tanning company

One half of the first ever summer Big Brother couple, Lisa is dating fellow new housemate Mario. Lisa says she?s often likened to Xena Warrior Princess, and says she?s “like a magnet exerting powerful attraction”.

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LUKE MARSDEN

Age: 20

From: Wigan

Occupation: Student, part-time pro-wrestling announcer

Luke is currently doing a Politics degree but his real love is wrestling. Since the age of 16, he?s been involved in the North West wrestling scene as a ring announcer and referee. Luke?s philosophy on life is “controversy creates cash” which he says is a theory he?s learned through wrestling.

?RACHEL RICEAge: 20From: Torfaen, WalesOccupation: English and Drama student, trainee teacher

Rachel is a former child actor, who featured alongside Hugh Grant in the film Night Train to Venice when she was eight years old. Filming in Rome, she says Grant even organised her eighth birthday party. She wants to be on Big Brother to represent “pretty, intelligent alpha females”.

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MARIO MARCONI

Age: 42

From: Warrington

Occupation: Former Tag Officer at the Home Office

The male half of the first ever summer series Big Brother couple, Mario takes as much pride in his appearance as girlfriend Lisa does, and regularly spends over two hours to get ready for a night out. His strangest job ever was as a stripping policeman on a myspace advertisement for hot tubs, and if he could be re-incarnated he would like to come back as racing driver Lewis Hamilton.?

REBECCA SHINER

Age: 21

From: Coventry

Occupation: Kindergarten nurse

Rebecca - who often refers to herself in the third person as “The Bex” - loves being the centre of attention. She says she wants to be famous, rich, and maybe a bit thinner. Her great love is going out, having a good time with friends and dancing on tables.?

MICHAEL HUGHES

Age: 33

From: Ayshire, Scotland

Occupation: Radio Producer

When Michael (Mikey) was 23 he lost his sight whilst undergoing an operation and has now been blind for 10 years. Mikey describes himself as wacky, zany and non-conformist and considers his best ability is to make others laugh. His favourite party trick is to do stand-up comedy whilst dressed up in girls? clothes.?

STEPHANIE McMICHAEL

Age: 19

From: Liverpool

Occupation: Maths and Economics Student

19-year-old Stephanie first appeared on television as a 13-year-old on Popstars: The Rivals. However after reaching the final 25 contestants, producers discovered she had lied about her age, after claiming she was 16. A confessed germophobe, she can?t touch door handles for fear of catching germs, and also has phobias of bats and moths. She says her life philosophy is “do what you want and don?t care”.

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MOHAMED MOHAMED

Age: 23

From: London

Occupation: Toy demonstrator at Hamleys

23 year-old Mohamed was born in Somalia and then moved to Kenya, Yeman, Eritrea, Ethiopia, Kenya and Dubai before moving to the UK with his family. Mohamed describes himself as crazy, outgoing and fun and firmly believes that you don?t need money to have fun … but it helps!

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SYLVIA BARRIE

Age: 21

From: South London, originally Sierra Leone

Occupation: Student/Sales Assistant

Sylvia came to the UK with her family aged 11, when the war started in her native Sierra Leone. Sylvia gives herself 5/10 for intelligence and 8/10 for looks, but says the only thing she doesn?t like about herself are her wrists as they are too skinny.

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REX NEWMARK

Age: 24

From: London

Occupation: Executive Chef

Already a successful chef and businessman, London socialite Rex?s three favourite things in life are food, money and success. As a top chef at some of London?s most renowned restaurants Rex describes himself as “My job is to be a professional bully ? people always tell me to stop being aggressive”.

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And that is your horrible lot, a bunch of self-centred, arrogant morons with an ounce of self respect for themselves and their families. Will I watch this program? Yeah, I probably will but as ever, I?ll get so angry at the dreadful state of society and switch off half way through each episode.

This entry was posted on Friday, June 6th, 2008 at 12:16 pm and is filed under Celebrities, Television. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.